For All the Mothers...

If you breast feed or bottle feed

If you stay at home, work from home, or have a full-time job outside the home

If you attachment parent or have a robust Venezuelan nanny

If your kid sleeps through the night or is awake every hour on the hour

If you make your own organic baby food or buy it when it's on sale at Target

If you never let your kids watch TV or if you anticipate an episode of Yo Gabba Gabba the same way you anticipate a shoe sale

If you make perfect healthy lunches or you almost always forget when it's your turn to bring snack

If you are full of boundless energy or so exhausted you need a caffeine drip in order to function

If your house is always spotless or you have a sink full of dishes and a carpet full of dust bunnies

If your daughter's hair bow always matches her outfit or you're pretty sure your son went to school in the same pants he wore yesterday

If your kid makes straight As or needs a math tutor

If you always leave the house perfectly dressed or you live in a uniform of sweatpants and t-shirt...

Pour yourself a glass of champagne

Give yourself a break

And have a Happy bleeping Mother's Day.

Because you absolutely deserve it.

Love,

The Princess and Me